Every time I went out to take notes on people around me, I felt like a stalker, but also a person that saw everything and knew everything, kind of like the Oracle from the movie “Matrix.” Doing these blog posts more than once has taken the fun out of viewing simple humor such as the commercials during the Super bowl, but has helped me to pay attention and exploit the hidden meanings in these couple seconds of glamour. When I simply walk around the beach or sit at a restaurant, I automatically start to analyze the communal egalitarianism taking place at the pier or the elitist values that rise up while ordering food. The walk through the Valley of Death run by the semiotic Gods, Sullivan, Solomon, and Maasik was one that I will never forget, but is also one that I would never again take.
The experience I got from revising my four blog posts, I would say, was a handful, but then again made me feel accomplished when I was done. The first drafts of my blog posts were all very broad in a sense that I was lacking in vivid, striking detail, connection to the American values, and the use of concision. For example, in my 2nd blog post, “Competitiveness of the Ballers,” I did not give any description of the people in the gym so I went in and fixed it by adding what the people looked like, what kind of people they were, and so forth. In my 1st blog post “Welcome to Teri Café,” I did not have a clear connection to the American value and had two ideas of conformity and individualism confusing the reader. Therefore, I thought over what the real value was (individualism), and connected it by using a quote that a customer said. Lastly, I needed some work on concision for my 4th blog post, “Hot Beach,” since I had many unnecessary words that extended my blog. I fixed this problem by taking out couple of words that did nothing, but take up space such as “On a hot, sunny afternoon.”
My best post out of all four would have to be my fourth blog post, “Hot Beach.” This is because I took a lot of descriptive notes on this particular location and overall spent more time on this post than the others. What I thought was good about this post was that it has many vivid details of the people that were around me at the beach to show the clear social distinction that these people had with each other to help convey my connection to the American value of communal egalitarianism. This post is also effective because I only use one quote, but it successfully gets the point across that people going to the beach is like a trend in the summer. All in all, this post has helped me the most to understand how to revise correctly and helped me by being able to use it to revise my other three posts.